Dreams haven't been the best lately. It's somewhat disheartening as I am someone who finds refuge in dreams. Often I dream of work I'll someday create with that imaginary performance art company that I'll magically run... eventually. Other times I dream of places I've visited, Puerto Mont and it's beautiful lakes, Italy and it's romantic cobble stone streets- embracing my craziness as I sing while I creep my way around the city. Recently, it's as if the dream fairy has taken a vacation and left Dr Macabre in charge, with full reign to concoct what he may with my already twisted mind. Lately, my dreams have been quite ominous.
I dreamt of San Francisco, the city I currently reside in, and of all it's magic and splendor. There was suddenly a tsunami warning and we all had to evacuate. The feeling was not quite what one would expect. I remember being calmed and wondering what would happen. As I made my way to the top of twin peaks, I found the water was climbing with me. It was completely crystalline and incredibly beautiful. I was a few steps away from the top of twin peaks (which had transformed into coit tower), I looked around and saw the entire city under a calm clear ocean of water. It was as if the city had been submerged in a clear drop of water and it was sitting still, waiting for something to happen. The water caught up with my feet and I played a bit with the water. Then I drowned.
I knew I had died because I was talking to my mother a few seconds later, naked, toweling my self off and telling her everything was going to be just fine. There wasn't any pain or bashfulness at being nude, it was just what it was.
I was sitting at the family's ranch in Mexico, holding a heart shaped flask I had seen earlier that day at Urban Outfitters. I had gloves on but no other sort of protection from the cold winters that can happen in Juarez- in fact, I'm not even sure if it was winter.
It began to rain, and I remember this quite clearly, it rained like the sky was falling one drop at a time. Each raindrop clearer than the other, coming down to the ground in a diagonal path towards me. Naturally, I ran under an awning to take cover (because every Mexican family ranch has an awning... right?). Lightning began to strike and turned the rainy afternoon into what seemed a dark day with flashes of a sunny afternoon. After the brightest lightning hit the ground, the wall that determines the perimeter of our ranch became see through, as if pulverized by a tremendous fire that consumed the city that laid beyond it.
Meanwhile, I stood under an awning watching everything happen.
